christmas inklings

i'm barricaded in the bedroom, bananie's lappy on mine..it's hot on my thighs.. it's been on, word processing the end of a very crappy semester, all day. almost.... done... one....more.. five... page.. paper.. to.. go.. oh, and a final tomorrow. i've never been so behind in my life. but, i'm trying to be optimistic, take it in stride. miss bananie is shuffling to and fro in the house. the xmas tree is down from its hiding place in the attic, pieced together and fluffed.. still a little wonky, but i'm sure we can even it out w/ trimmings and a strong length of fishing line (because of the cats). it is so strange to have xmas happening all around me, and here i am, sadly ambivalent. last night i was able to forget all of my ill will towards the commercial craze. we scooted to mother egans for some fish-n-chips to celebrate the cooler weather. i took my cupcake through many back street detours to look at the east-side lights. i forgot all about my grinchy feelings and found myself enjoying all the twinkling-ness of the modest little houses, decked out with large plastic nativity scenes or large shrines to the lady of guadalupe. i'm so glad for annie... she gets me out of myself and into a 'treasure the moment' sort of mood. we ended up scooting over to 37th street as well to see the block of lights. it's the first time i've done that in a very long while, and it was quite enjoyable. we decided to park and walk through the light show, walking through people's back yards, collecting passes for free hugs and sipping on lukewarm chai tea. it was the best association with holiday cheer i've had in as long as i can remember. And the best part is that i was with my bananie. no more missed holidays. she is finally my home. and for this i am very thankful. Annie makes the holidays a happy time for me.